So its 10:30 I’m finally eating dinner and haven’t started the paper I need to write to night. Emotion, stress and lack of sleep have been affecting me greatly. I’m over analyzing thing but when I think I am I question weather or not I’m not analyzing it enough. Relationships with friends and or more than friends are either in an awkward stage or seem to bee falling apart. People don't seem to be talking about the important stuff any more its just all drama. I feel that I’m in the middle of some sort of crisis but know one is telling me what it is. I feel like a def man who can’t hear the gunshots or the bullets flying past his head.

Damage has been done but I think I could have been avoided, or at least lessoned if people would talk face to face more and really come to a conclusion or make an effort to change. But now that the wound in there I need to do what I can to start to wash it out and patch it up so it ca heal. The cleaning hurts but the healing gives hope.

I need rest, spiritual, emotional and physical all at the same time. Unfortunately it’s very hard to rest in all three areas at the same time.

I need to start writing my paper. Sorry it’s a bit of a downer but that’s how I feel.

I have found that the group of people I hang out have a very interesting dynamic (this includes me). The unexpected happened and what I some what expected didn't happen. Emotions have been stressed, strained, pulled, and twisted. Late nights and long days have been adding to all of it, not in a good way but not in a bad way either. But I suppose that depends on how you look at it.

Too much communication can cause as many problems and too little.

I just need to pray and keep moving.

i was going to write a little longer blog but my friends just showed up so i need to type fast.

so i have been in a very tired and unfocused mood to day. its mainly form monday and the good times we had there.

i might write more later.